Holiday Preparations…

6:30 a.m. conversation with David:
David:  Look, Mom! Here’s a pretty ornnament.
Me: Be very careful with that one, David. It looks breakable.
David: I’ll be very careful.
CRASH
David (in a sing-song voice): Well, you were right!  It was breakable!
Overheard on the el this morning:
“So I said to Brad, ‘Why don’t we get them movie tickets?’ And he said, [...]

Dear Santa

Dear Santa,
I don’t have much time to write this, as I’m kinda rushing from one thing to the next this weekend.  So forgive the typos (you should see my handwriting if you think my typing is bad.)
I’ve been a very good girl all year. Well, maybe 8 on a 10-point scale. Some days a 5. [...]

Less frayed around the edges

My sister and brother-in-law came to stay with the kids while I was out of town last week and as a result, we are now a lot less frayed around the edges. I’m happy to report that:
1. We have new shower curtain liners in both showers. No more mildew.
2. All the lights in the house [...]

Frayed around the edges

If you were to walk into my house today, your first impression would likely be of a small, tidy, relatively uncluttered, fairly clean home.
But if you look more closely, you’d begin to see the evidence that there is way more to be done than I am capable of doing on my own. More to be [...]

Top 10 rules for parents

So since I found out that the Baby Einstein thing was all a big scam, I’ve been thinking about what I would tell new parents (if asked, that is.  I try really hard – not always successfully – not to give unsolicited advice.)
So here are my “rules” for parenting, for if anyone is interested:
1. Relax. [...]

I want my money back

Oh, crap. All those Baby Einstein videos I bought aren’t going to guarantee David’s admission to Harvard? Oops – guess I’ve been duped.
(David who rarely wears a shirt unless he’s leaving the house)
I think Emma was about five when I realized that there’s a reason why most kids don’t get into Harvard, and it’s not [...]

Dear David, I’m sorry

Dear David,
Please accept my sincere apologies for the fact that I did not collect your tooth and leave money last night.  I can only imagine your heart-rending sobs this morning when you looked under you pillow and discovered that your tooth was still there.  There’s so little in life you can really count on, and [...]

Spinning the plates

One thing I’ve come to realize over the past few months is that people worry about me when I’m not blogging regularly. If a week goes by with no new posts, I start to get emails from friends and family asking if I’m okay.  Which is nice. It makes me feel cared for. And like [...]

A list of things I can’t do

1. Fix a balloon animal when it starts to fall apart, or unwind, or whatever it is that balloon animals do when they stop being the shape that the balloon animal man created. 
2. Go back in time and make things be different. (As in, BUT I DIDN’T WANT YOU TO CUT MY SANDWICH!!!!!) (But won’t [...]

Things I learned this Labor Day weekend

1. A blue Sharpie in the hands of a 3-year-old is a very bad thing.
2. Blue Sharpie does not come out of tan Berber carpeting, although Mr. Clean Magic Eraser makes it less noticeable.
3. Blue Sharpie does not come off Mac keyboards.
4. When using a wet Mr. Clean Magic Eraser to try to clean a [...]