I try really, really hard not to give advice. So if you don’t want advice, stop reading now.
Well, okay, since you asked:
1. Just because you can get it zipped doesn’t mean you should wear it.
2. Put a little lipstick on. It will make you feel better. (This one’s courtesy of my friend Eva’s mom. And is really just advice for women.)
3. A good tailor is your best friend.
4. Before leaving the house, try to get a look at the rear view in the mirror, as well as the front view. (If you have young children, check your shoulders and upper back too. You never know what is on kids’ hands.)
5. If you’re tired, go to bed. If you’re hungry, eat. (But don’t eat if you’re not hungry.)
6. Don’t send text messages while you’re driving.
7. After dinner, check to make sure you don’t have broccoli in your teeth.
8. No matter how much you need the money, don’t go on a reality TV show. No good will come of it in the end. (See: Patti Blagojevich, Jon and Kate, and Susan Boyle.)
9. Go to see every Pixar movie (we just saw “Up”.)
10. Don’t give people unsolicited advice. They hate it.
And a bonus: Don’t marry Drew Peterson.
And how many of these do I follow on a regular basis? I always try to wear lipstick.