Things I’ve Been Thinking About

1. Why do airports still have screens displaying arriving flights in the gate area when the only people who can go through security are people who are leaving? Please tell me what I’m missing here.

2. Can’t they figure out a better way to package eggs? By my estimation, approximately half of all egg cartons in the supermarket have at least one broken egg. This seems very wasteful.

3. If someone developed a fragrance called “New Baby Smell”, they would sell a lot of it.

4. Mini-vans should have sensors on the sides which beep when you’re too close to the side of the garage. Another option would be to make sure that the color of the van is the same as the paint color of the garage.

5. Don’t keep pet monkeys in your house. Seriously. Or this will happen.

6. Why does the water in the public-restroom sink only turn on after I STOP waving my hand in front of the sensor?

7. I read a statistic that 2% of people respond to SPAM. I’m dying to know who these people are and what they’re thinking.

8. Clorox Bleach-Free Hand-Sanitizer? Really? Sorry, Clorox, you can say “bleach-free” on the package, but Clorox = bleach, and I’m not putting bleach on my hands.

And those are the things I’ve been thinking about.

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